Which bit of toast should I eat first?

Toast. That slice of crispy bread lathered in butter is delicious right. Well no. I never would have thought that toast would have become the bane of my life. But it has. That one slice of crispy bread I am seriously starting to detest. And I will tell you why. My son is currently in a phase of having a slice of toast before bed for his supper. This is great. But you would not believe how many variables are involved in getting toast right for my son.

Colour
First it has to the correct colour. Yes we all like toast done to our own liking but my preference is a scale of colour somewhere in the middle of not too white, not too burnt and I can eat varying degrees of toastedness. Not my son, he has one colour and crispiness of toast. It’s not crispy more soggy and it’s a very pale brown. Lightly toasted I would call it. If I go over (which I do quite frequently) he sends it back to the kitchen with the head chef suitably chastised. I now stand at the toaster lifting the handle up which brings the toast up to keep an eye on it. Nobody in my house can talk to me during this very important process. If I’m distracted I’m done for. And so is the toast.

Consistency
The make, which determines the consistency of bread is important too. I shop a mixture of Tesco and Aldi and buy the supermarkets own bread so this is what we are used to. It has a nice flat texture that seems to suit my son. One day we ran out and my husband went to Sainsbury’s. Now this bread seemed to be a higher class of bread. It was fluffy and light. And as soon as I saw it I knew it wouldn’t work. But I had no option. I toasted it but it just looked fluffy, it was the wrong consistency. If you had asked me a year ago about bread and toast I would never have noticed anything like this but now I do. I buttered it and took it out. It was rejected straight away just by look. I didn’t argue. I choose my battles and if making another slice of toast provides comfort for my son, who a lot of the time seems uncomfortable in day to day life then I will do it. I made a second slice and when he saw it he wrinkled his nose and asked me…

“Do you think I should eat it?”

This told me he didn’t want to eat it. I said I would make him another slice but he said it’s ok I’ll eat it. I knew he wouldn’t enjoy eating it but he did eat it.

Butter
Buttering the toast – getting the correct butter to toast ratio right is important. How my son likes it is to see the butter on the bread but he won’t eat it until the butter has melted in. So if I put too little butter on it melts in before I’ve given it to him. Too much butter it takes ages to melt in and some bits of butter don’t melt in so he won’t eat it. I then have to get a knife and scrape off the unmelted butter.

Cutting
Cutting the toast is another variable that thankfully doesn’t cause us much issues now. When he was very young he would only eat toast if it was like this……

I would cut it up with scissors I kid you not. Now we have made progress, but he’s only small still so I cut his toast into quarters. Although my dad has said that when he has toast at his house he cuts it into threes. I mean that’s odd right who on earth cuts toast into 3….just my dad I expect!! At my house I cut it into quarters and make sure that all bits of toast are separated. If they aren’t he will ask me to separate them. Even after I have separated them he moves them around his plate until they are in the correct position for him. Sometimes this can take him a while.

And after it’s the correct colour and toastedness, perfect make and consistency of bread, perfect butter to toast ratio, cut into 4 bits, butter melted in and bits separated he will then ask….

“Which bit of toast do you think I should eat first?”

I always give the same answer. The bit that is closest to you. As the way he positions them on the plate there is always one bit that is closest to him. And that is how he eats them. Each bit that is closest to him gets eaten next. And that is why I toast is currently the bane of my life. But when I get it right and I see my son eat the toast happy it’s worth it’s weight in gold. So next time you make and eat toast and the whole process takes around ten minutes think of my son who needs all this just to eat and enjoy a slice of toast.