What Happens When Your Child Has No Filter?

What would you do if your child had no filter and literally said what they see?

Because that is exactly what we have.

My son, when he’s in a good place, is honestly some of the best company you could ever wish for. He’s funny, witty, and absolutely himself. But he has no filter. None. He says out loud what other people might be thinking but would never dare say. And he says it loudly.

Sometimes it’s uncomfortable, sometimes it’s mortifying… and sometimes it’s absolutely hilarious.

The “Naked Lady” at the Beach

Take our recent holiday, for example.

Surprisingly, my son loved the beach. The sea fascinated him and he spent ages happily splashing around, which was such a joy to see. But it was very hot, and many women on the beach were wearing tiny bikinis—or sometimes no tops at all.

One afternoon, a woman floated past us on a bright green lilo. My son stopped, pointed, and bellowed for everyone to hear:

“There’s a naked lady in the sea!”

I froze. There’s no correcting him in moments like that—you just have to nod, move on quickly, and pray he doesn’t get more specific.

But of course, he did.

“Look, it’s the lady on the green lilo!”

Mortified doesn’t even begin to cover it.

Everyone is “Jamaican”

Another moment, more tricky to handle, came around ethnicity. I want to say straight away: this is not to offend anyone. It’s just to show how my son’s brain makes literal connections, and how he has no filter when sharing them.

On holiday, every time we walked past someone who was Black, my son would pipe up, loudly and with total certainty:

“There’s a Jamaican!”
“Look Mam, that person is from Jamaica!”

Every. Single. Time.

Now, he has no idea where people are from—he’s simply latched onto the word “Jamaican” after watching the film Cool Runnings about the Jamaican bobsled team. In his very literal mind: Black person = Jamaican.

We live in an area that isn’t very multicultural, so for him this was unusual and stood out. For me, it was a reminder that these are conversations we’ll keep having—about people, places, and the amazing diversity in the world. But in the moment? The best thing to do is ignore it and move on quickly, before it turns into a scene.

It’s not the only time his literal thinking has made for some awkward moments. We once ordered something online that was being shipped from China. For days, he asked if it had arrived yet. Finally, when it did, I called him over excitedly. His very first question?

“Was the delivery man from China?”

That’s just how his brain works: what you say, he takes at face value.

Teenage Spots & Brutal Honesty

Another holiday example: we had a friend and his 12-year-old daughter with us. She had just entered that teenage stage of experimenting with makeup and caring about her appearance.

At dinner one evening, my son sat opposite her, peered across the table, and announced:

“You have two big spots on your head.”

The last thing a teenage girl wants to hear! Luckily, she’d been around him enough to know what he’s like, and she took it in her stride. But still—classic no filter moment.

The Nose Incident

And finally, one of my personal favourites.

We were driving to a local football match in two cars—me blissfully alone in one, and my husband, kids, and in-laws crammed into the other. Those twenty minutes of peace, blasting my music and singing along, were pure heaven.

When I met them at the ground, they all looked exhausted. My son had monopolised the entire journey, talking non-stop about anything and everything. The highlight?

At one point he turned to my father-in-law and said matter-of-factly:

“Your nose is huge. Much bigger than anyone elses.”

I thanked my lucky stars I wasn’t in that car!

Life with No Filter

This is life with my son. Unfiltered. Honest. Sometimes embarrassing, sometimes hilarious, always unforgettable.

And while it’s not always easy in the moment, I know his honesty is just who he is—and I wouldn’t change him for the world.